Happy news. “Ban,” the dog found floating on the roof of a house more than a mile off the Japanese coast, has been reunited with her companion.
Weird news. News came out this week that Bristol Palin was paid $262,000 in 2009 to be the teen pregnancy prevention ambassador for The Candies Foundation. Um, cue the music, Alanis Morissette. Isn’t that ironic? Bristol makes hundreds of thousands of dollars for getting knocked up and then tell young ladies not to do it?
Sucky idea! A children’s toy company in Spain has introduced a doll that lets little girls play like they are nursing their babies. Yep, “Bebe Gloton” (which means “greedy baby”) comes with a halter top that your little girl puts on with daisies that act like nipples. Once the baby is “attached” the baby makes sucking sounds. When baby is done, it cries until it’s burped. Company says it will promote breastfeeding. I say, let Bristol take ‘em on her speaking tour!
Friday payday. Rebecca Black, the teen whose song “Friday” received a love/hate cult like following, is getting rich. Forbes says she’s earned more than $20,000 off her YouTube video and hundreds of thousands of dollars off iTune downloads of the song. Not a bad return on an initial $2000 investment. Take that haters!
Elderly Texting. In light of the new Oxford Dictionary words OMG and LOL, a friend sent me the “senior’s texting code.” Here are a few of the terms: ATD = At The Doctors. BFF = Best Friend Fell. BTW = Bring The Wheelchair. FWIW = Forgot Where I Was. LMDO = Laughing My Dentures Out. ROFL and CGU = Rolling On The Floor Laughing and Can’t Get Up! TTYL = Talk To You Louder.
Eau de Hog. I thought this was an April Fool’s joke, but it isn’t. “Because some things are just too good,” there’s a new cologne on the market, Bacōn. Yep, a bacon-scented fragrance with 11 essential oils! The claim on baconcologne.com is that wearing a bacon essence will be great for your career. I’m not sure about that, but it is sure to get you loved by every dog in town.
Last laugh. Two boll weevils grew up in my home state South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind and worked in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.
Now, eat your dinner!
