Rumor has it that Weezer, one of those fantastic bands that somehow lives mostly under the radar, is planning a Blue album (you might know The Sweater Song from that one) and Pinkerton tour. The idea is that they’d do a two-night concert in each city, and perform the songs from each album in their entirety. If that’s not good Monday news, I don’t know what is. These guys were nerdy-cool long before Glee made being nerdy actually cool.
I have a bunch of friends with fall birthdays, and I recently came across the most perfect little gifts in this tiny stationary shop in NYC. Knock Knock products are quite possibly the best thing to happen to Post-Its. Ever. Reasonably priced, easy to ship and most importantly, ridiculously hilarious. I definitely have some Virgo and Libra friends who will be getting a To Don’t notepad, an Accomplish notebook, and (maybe) a Humorous Apology notepad. Seriously, get your Christmas shopping done four months early.
I definitely had an “Only in America” moment when I saw this article in a central Texas newspaper. So many unanswered questions surround this small-town crime. How did the thieves manage to snatch a trailer full of cans? Why did no one notice? Where did they stash the evidence? But, as the sign says, No Questions Asked. Frankly, I think I’m having more of a “Only in small town Texas” moment now.
It’s time to dust off those Juicy Couture sweatsuits and Swarovski crystals. No, not yours. Your dog’s! The most fashionable and lavishly dressed pups will trot down the runway in New York City this weekend for Pet Fashion Week. Registration is closed, but you can always dress Rover in his finest Diva Dog digs and walk him around the neighborhood. Doesn’t work so well with cats, apparently.
Ladies and gentlemen, Jensen Kimmitt is your 2010 National Yo-Yo Champion. This Canadian Yo-yo pro is super talented and surprisingly fun to watch. I remember when I got my first Duncan Yo-yo to walk the dog. And that was about where my yo-yo career ended. What I want to know is this: How does someone figure out they have this talent? Also, how is the string not in one gigantic knot when he’s done?
It’s literally the biggest shock in sports history. (Appreciate the sarcasm here, please.) Brett Favre is…not…retiring. He’s back to play his 20th season with the Vikings. Favre says it’s the chance to play in yet another Super Bowl, not the $13 million contract, that brought him back to the NFL. How many more games will we see out of this superstar? Is there a season 21 in the future? Perhaps most importantly, will there be a reprise of Pants on the Ground?
Add a little adorable to your Tuesday afternoon and check out this video of Simon’s Cat ‘Fly Guy’. With nutty characters like this old lady and this other guy taking over our YouTube airwaves, it’s super nice to see some good old-fashioned cat cartoon humor. For a little more adorable-ness, watch this cat talk to a bird in a nearby tree. I know. Total cute overload.
A Very Bad Poem I Wrote Just Now in Honor of National Bad Poetry Day
Today is National Bad Poetry Day
So jump up and say “hey!”
Tell your friends and family, if you may
And celebrate on the Internet-ay
Write poems your way
Or see what others have to say
You don’t even have to pay
It sure makes me shout hooray!
On this National Bad Poetry Day.
Britney likes her a Venti Vanilla FrappuccinoEnglish professor Lynne Rosenthal says she’s no Steven Slater. But she has achieved folk hero status among us coffee drinkers on the Upper West Side of NYC. The NY Post reported Monday that the 60ish phD would not comply with what she called Starbuck’s “linguistic fascism,” refusing to say “without butter or cheese” rather than “plain” for her toasted multi-grain bagel. The police were called and escorted her out. And she’s never going back! Which brings me to this: isn’t “small” “medium” and “large” good enough? The last thing I want in the morning is to have to perform verbal gymnastics in order to get the bagel I’m already paying double market value for! Let’s make things simple. The diner doesn’t require me to say “Adam and Eve on a raft” to get my eggs and toast!
Wake up, Muffy! It's Twenty-Ten!
Genius Lisa Birnbach is back! And I just ordered my copy of her True Prep! Thirty years after Lisa’s international best-selling phenom The Official Preppy Handbook, she and designer Chip Kidd are taking a contemporary look at how Wasps have adapted. And if this month’s Vanity Fair brilliance on the book is any indication, they’ve got another smash on their hands. The book takes on everything from scandal (including rehab and prison) to political correctness, reality TV, and . . . polar fleece. Oh, and a do-it-yourself eulogy! A “how to”? That reminds me. Lisa and I’ve had some “how to” fun together: here’s us cleaning up some clutter?
